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before I answer your question, I have to make sure we are talking about the same software, as some of your questions are a bit confusing.
The APEX Listener is a relatively new option for a web server for APEX. It's not the database listener, that provides network access to the database.
1. If you don't use the embedded GlassFish, you can deploy multiple listeners onto the same application server.
2. This answer would be obvious if you read the documentation and you actually want to do something with APEX.
3. This is quite obvious too: Of course you can have multiple web servers pointing at the same (APEX) instance on the same database.